When I'm 20, and all Growed Up

Last Friday night while Josh watched the BYU football game with the older kids, I took Henry up to bed. As I tucked his blankets around his chin, he looked up and asked, "Mommy, will you lay down with me?"

I can't always say yes. When the baby is still awake, or other children need to be wrangled, I have to say no, promising instead to come and check on him in a few minutes. But that Friday night, with the other children blissfully occupied, and Ivy long asleep, I most happily agreed to snuggle up with Henry for a few blessed minutes of rest. I climbed over him onto his bottom bunk and wedged myself against the wall, propping my head on a Lightning McQueen pillow. 

After a few minutes of listening to Henry's quiet breathing, I thought he must be sleeping. But then he turned, and said, 

"Mommy, what happens when I'm 20 and all growed up and their isn't room for you in my bed?"

Oh, be still my mother heart.

"Henry," I responded. "When you're 20, you won't need me to lay down with you anymore. You'll be all grown up, on your mission or in college, and will be able to sleep on your own."

I could hear a slight tremor in his voice when he asked, "But what will I do?"

I reached over and stroked his back. "You'll say your prayers and climb into your bed, maybe stretch a little bit, and go to sleep."

"But Mommy," he said. "I like to sleep where my family is."

"Henry, I promise you won't have to sleep away from your family until you feel ready," I said. 

"But what about college?!" 

At this point, Henry was obviously starting to feel real distress. Trying to find some way to console him, I said, "Maybe you can go to college during the day, then still come home and sleep here at night."

"OH!" he said, finally relieved. "I will TOTALLY do that."

Heaven help the boy when he receives a mission call to Tonga. 

*********

Henry has always been a tender, sweet, sweet boy. He has a sensitivity that is unique among his siblings - a genuine thoughtfulness and an unabashed willingness to love that is constantly touching my heart. He and I took a walk through the woods yesterday afternoon. He immediately took the lead, pointing out the thorns he thought I should avoid, and holding back branches that crossed our path so I could move by.

"I'll hold this for you, Mommy," he would say. 

Then, just this morning, I asked him to change out of his shorts into blue jeans because it was chilly outside and we were getting ready to leave. He grumbled a little bit, then sat down on the couch. The last thing I heard him say before I went upstairs to get Ivy dressed is that he WANTED to wear his shorts. But sure enough, when I came back downstairs, he was wearing his blue jeans, just as I asked.  "Henry!" I said, "You DID put your blue jeans on. Thank you for listening!" 

He shrugged his shoulders. "It's because I love you," he said. 

I've always said that Henry was my mercy baby. After handling the twins, I think God knew I needed something easy to ease me back into the world of babies. Oh, how Henry was a dream. A good sleeper, a good eater, an eternally pleasant baby. And he's still a dream. Of course, he has his moments. But they are well worth enduring for the joy he brings to our family. 

What is so incredible about having a large family is that even when life is loud and hectic and chaotic beyond reason, I can still see the unique way that we all fit together. I have no doubt that we are a family by design - not just random souls chucked together for the living, but a family of Divine creation, meant to experience and progress and learn through life together. 

And that makes me happy.